Counseling Blog
February 2026
Created for connection: Combating loneliness
Has there ever been a moment in your own life when you have felt profoundly alone? What emotions accompanied this state of being? Sadness, longing, and helplessness are a few that come to mind. This question likely elicits a negative emotional response, for we as human beings avoid loneliness at all costs. This is because from the very beginning of creation, God made it clear that we are designed for connection. He formed us to live in relationship with Him and with one another. Yet, despite living in the most “connected” era in human history thanks to the internet and all manner of connected devices, many children and teens today feel profoundly alone.
As parents and educators, we are witnessing a quiet epidemic of loneliness in our youth—one that is often hidden behind screens, social media posts, and the illusion of digital “friendships.”
Recent research shows that loneliness among children and adolescents has grown dramatically over the past decade:
- A 2023 study published in the Journal of Adolescence found that rates of self-reported loneliness among teens have increased by more than 50% since 2012, correlating with the rise of smartphones and social media.
- According to the Cigna U.S. Loneliness Index, 79% of Gen Z youth report feeling lonely—more than any previous generation. To provide perspective of this statistic here at Dunham, Gen Z spans from 6th grade to 12th grade, 474 students in total. That equates to 375 of our 6th-12th grade students who might report feeling lonely.
- Despite having hundreds or even thousands of online “friends,” many students report lacking even one or two deep, meaningful relationships where they feel seen and known.
While technology can keep us informed and entertained, it has also replaced genuine, face-to-face interaction with digital engagement—often leading to greater feelings of isolation. Social media and online communication can simulate connection, but they rarely satisfy our God-given need for community. Platforms that promise belonging often lead to comparison, envy, and fear of missing out (FOMO).
Psychologically, scrolling through filtered images of other people’s lives triggers feelings of inadequacy and exclusion. The more time students spend online, the more likely they are to experience loneliness, anxiety, and depression. Studies from the American Psychological Association and Harvard Graduate School of Education consistently show that excessive screen time is linked to lower well-being, fewer close friendships, and decreased empathy. We were not created to connect through screens—we were created to connect through relationship.
The Bible is filled with examples of how deeply God values relationship:
- “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow.” Ecclesiastes 4:9–10
- “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together… but encouraging one another.” Hebrews 10:24–25
- “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” John 15:12-13
As parents, you play the most critical role in teaching your children that connection is not just social—it’s spiritual. Here are some practical ways to help combat loneliness in your home and nurture deeper relationships:
Model Healthly Connection
Children learn relational habits from watching their parents. Demonstrate attentive listening, empathy, and curiosity in your daily interactions. Let your child see you prioritize people over phones. Put devices aside during family time and encourage conversation.
Limit Digital Consumption
Research suggests that limiting social media use to under one hour per day significantly reduces loneliness and depression in teens (University of Pennsylvania, 2018). Help your child set healthy boundaries around screen time. Encourage real-world activities—sports, arts, service, or church groups—where they can build face-to-face relationships.
Create Spaces for Real Conversations
Build rhythms of connection into your family routine. Share a “high and low” of the day at dinner, take short walks together without distractions, or end the day with prayer and reflection. Simple, consistent time together communicates: You are known. You are seen. You belong here.
Encourage Faith-Based Community
Being at a school like Dunham helpfully immerses your child in God’s Word and surrounds them in love as a part of a community of believers. Additional involvement in youth groups, chapel, small group Bible studies, or Christian service projects gives children opportunities to experience authentic communities built on shared faith and purpose.
Teach Connection as Part of God's Calling
Remind your child that connecting with others is part of living out the Gospel. When they show kindness, include a lonely peer, or reach out to a friend in need, they are reflecting the love of Christ. Ultimately, the deepest cure for loneliness is belonging—not just socially, but spiritually. Every child needs to know that even when they feel unseen by others, they are fully known and loved by God. Connection to Him fuels connection to others.
As a school rooted in a biblical worldview, Dunham believes that helping children form real, Christ-centered relationships is just as essential as academic excellence. In a world where loneliness is rising, our commitment is to continue to educate minds and hearts for Christ, partnering with you as parents to teach our children that God created us for community, and that real connection happens face-to-face and heart-to-heart. Hopefully, our children are learning daily that in Christ, we are never truly alone.
“Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” Romans 12:10
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